I have PHD

In fact I think most moms have PHD's. Pre-holiday depression and post-holiday depression.

Emma goes to one of those schools where the toddlers are worked to the bone. There's baking days and plant a flower day. Pizza making day really takes it out of her, as does build a kite day and farm day. And so she needs a holiday....every 3 months, for three to four weeks at a time.

I, like all (or most working moms) dread that 'Dear Parents as you know Friday is the last day of term' newsletter. The only other person who dreads that newsletter more than me is our domestic goddess. What the heck is Emma supposed to do for the next three weeks? There is holiday club (for some part of the holidays) until 12pm but that still leaves a toddler with four or five hours free. Do you know how much trouble can be gotten into in four hours?

Yes, there's play dates and kiddies venues and there's movies and zoos. But those things need a parent and Mark and I both work. And unlike toddlers I don't get three to four weeks holiday every three to four months.

And then there's post-holiday depression. This happens when Emma's back at school and I sit, heavily laden with guilt, berating myself because I'm a working mom. That I should have spent more time with her and done loads of fun things.

And while I wallow in the mire that is motherhood I think of all the holidays. There's school holidays and religious holidays. There's Worker day and Youth day and Freedom day. There's a day of Reconciliation and Christmas. But there's no mom days.

Where's the 'been up since 3am can I lie in?' day or 'I smell like vomit I'm off to the salon' day. How I'd love 'the weekend wore me out I'm taking a Monday' day or 'I didn't get enough done on Saturday therefore I get a do-over day?' day. What mom doesn't need a 'I don't wanna be a mom today so I'm off to watch a movie, maybe have a light lunch, definitely have a bottle of wine' day. I could definitely use a 'just gonna hang around (or hang myself)' day or the 'grabbed my bag and ran; not sure when I'll be back' day. I know I'd kill for 'out of order, shaving my legs' day or a 'I know I'll kill if I don't get some time off'' day. And just this morning I needed a 'I have a crick in my neck cos I had a kid in the bed' day


When we do get our measly 15 or 18 days 'off' it invariably means 24 hours, seven days a week with the kids, which again gives me a bout of PHD (Pre) until I'm back in the office, behind my desk with PHD (post) because I didn't enjoy the valuable time with my children when I had the chance. And of course another holiday comes to mind; a "been away from work with a toddler and a tot and there aren't enough bottles of wine to make me feel anywhere near human" day...

Happy holidays everyone xxx